Des Vu

by Marcela Homsany

Buenas, 

¿Como estas? Perdon que no te he podido hablar- he estado soñando. Con el tiempo que pasa, me he dado cuenta que nunca me voy a levantar. Tal vez es el ritmo de tu esperanzas que me tiene dormida and dreaming/ I can only sing to you about my fears/ how one winter morning/ I cherished your voice/ singing happy birthday to me/ how the next/ the only voice heard was mine/ screaming for you to just take one more breath/ sing me goodbye/ while you lay next to me/ my sweet screams reaching the heavens/ where your song once set its path/ now your soul sits in front of a panel of judges/ I crushed your hand/ 3 squeezes I love you/ fingers intertwined, please squeeze back/ I need to remember how it felt/ when your sweaty palms warmed my ever so cold hands/ now it is your hands that are cold, and the sweat of my palms are replaced my tears/ and the blood has rushed from my hands to my head/ I cannot give you the warmth and life you once gave me/ my hands now hold a cold misshaped rock/ I set it on your grave with the memories i have of you/ how easy it was to hold your hand/ how hard it is to hold this rock/a voice cracked due to water damage/ I was 32 when you died/ I don't know how I'm going on without you/ empty of these hands/ my eyes are opens/yours collapsed/ the wind building up the courage to blow me into the abyss/ started running from this life to the next/ i used what you left me to buy the dream we were gonna live together/ but I can't outrun the emptiness i feel without you/ there's a city a see out my window/ pockets of life who never knew your name/ your youngest son was 1 when you left / he never celebrated a father's day/ I can't shut the blinds of these windows/ some nights, you are those pockets of light/ some nights, those lights help me see/ why you left, I will never know/ desires of man have never  outweighed those of Gd's/ to be tripped in the race to paradise/ I'm beginning to forget things/ the price I pay for the sins I've committed without you/ my partner in crime has been replaced by your ghost/ Jamil/ to what importance/ there are people in my room who claim they are my children/ who are they, Jamil?/ a mother can never forget her children/ I cannot recognize the beings before me/ they told me I have 5/ but only 2 stand in front of me/ one must be the son who never saw a father on father's day/ the other must be the one who didn't get enough/ they stand sour at each others' sight/ but where are my daughters Jamil?/ buenas? / hello?/ I miss you Jamil/ a sip of espresso/ a sip of a life with you/ a single lick of the lips/ i am bound to the clock of recollection/ the echo of your song caged in my memories/ this chair is comfy and i dreaming/ I cannot say where you've went/ where you will no longer be/ with a white glow that refuses hunger/ fragments of your face appear in each one of these men/a phantom has replaced my reflection in the mirror/ my mind has erased into the screams of your name/ I sit in a chair looking out the window, wondering when you will come back home/ beyond the pockets of light and shades that you used to close/ a purple spring night lifts my eyes to yours/ I have lived this life more a widow than a wife/ but those memories have been replaced with the sound of your voice.

Insanity is Doing the Same Thing Twice

by Enya Smilovic

Insanity is doing the same thing twice,
But I did it three times.
Exposed four words to you,
Receiving not one in return.

Spent five years hoping,
The sixth my funeral;
Not even seven guests.

Eight times I'd begged for you back
For you to say no nine times.

I used to be your perfect ten,
Sometimes an eleven, your heaven on earth.
Twelve steps to recovering,
But the thirteenth is falling in love again.

Sea Glass

by Eliana Wagner

I strive to be like sea glass
Smoothed by tides that beat down
Upon me day after day after day
Instead of cracking under pressure

I will be moved by the waves
Learn to rise with the tides
Shine brighter as time passes
Rest quietly on the shore

The salt and time will smooth my edges
Jagged ends will meet and curve
The pressing pressure of the ocean
Will only polish my surface

But some days I'm just a bottle
Laying lonely by the waves
My cap is lost, my neck is cracked
Cast away from calling tides

But every piece of sea glass
Began when it could break
Before suffering wild oceans
Or learning what it could take

The Lonely Monologue of Charles Collins

by Chana Coughlan

I wonder
As I sit here in my new unfamiliar life
Will I ever settle
When will I be in their lives forever
Nurturing them to bloom like Gentians
Victorious in the heat of melting faith

I wonder
The marigolds that once sang in our backyard
Do they murmur through the decaying roots
Like children trusting their garden

I wonder
As my glass grows beads of water
Wells of dreams
And oceans of potential
Condensating on the side of my glass

I wonder
As I wipe them away
As quickly as I did to them
What does she look like?
What sports does he play?

I wonder
If she has my eyes
If he plays golf
Like my father did with me

Can't find my way through this dimension
So I go on to create new ones
Whiskey
Gin and Tonic
Vodka on the rocks

I wonder
If he still drinks “blue smurfs”
And her, shirley temples, with extra cherries
If she is even old enough to order a drink at the bar?

I wonder
Does the change in time zone
Change my need for commitment
Mountain time is leisurely
And it seems that the sun never sets on the west coast

I wonder
If I'll end up alone
Don't know where I'm going
Will the drink in my glass satisfy me
As deeply as this incessant doubt
Or as widely as their distrust in men

A Trip Down Memory Lane

 

by Yael Spodek

What I would give to be in the sun
With sand clawing my back, sticking to my skin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun

Salt water tangles my hair, so I put it in a bun
The same as when we played the games you'd always let me win
What I would give to be in the sun

Seagulls caw and peck my food until I'm left with none
But maybe you'd have stayed if I was thin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun

Sweat drips down my body, "it's so hot, I'm done"
I hear you whisper a reply with a fox's grin
What I would give to be in the sun

Swimming from reality, I know I'm not the one
You ask who hurt me, I don't know where to begin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun

Seashell fragments cut my feet and I can't run
Whatever I do I'm reminded of you, where have you been?
What I would give to be in the sun
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun

Oh wow, check out this poem...

 I think you will appreciate the sharp imagery of this poem by Rae Armantrout. She's one of my favorite living poets. She's amazing:

https://believermag.com/rae-armantrout-one-thing/

The BenDayans in Morocco

by Erica Sultan

my great-grandmother was named after a girl who was
maimed and martyred.
betrayed by a friend, she was stolen from her home,
left to the whims of a
prideful pasha.
their names are Sol,
and they are the warmth that beams from Tangier's sun.
.
my grandmother was named after hers who was
blamed and battered.
hated by a neighbor, she was evicted from her home,
and remained with her
buried brethren.
their names are Rajmona,
and they are the wind that sweeps Melilla's shore.
.
my father was named after his great-grandfather who was
bruised and butchered.
found not-guilty by an official, his murderer moved into his home.
his death certificate left
spurned, spotless.
their names are Messoud,
and they are the rocks that form Oujda's mountains.